JOY!

Lessons from a Two Year Old

Matthew 18:10 See that you do not look down on one of these little ones.  For I tell you that their angels in heaven always see the face of my father in heaven.

Lay down, you need to get some rest.  Keller was not agreeing with my talk about nap time.  Chattering away about the planned excursion on the Polar Express Grapevine Christmas train, he tossed and turned, flipped and scrunched.  Come on now, let’s be quiet and sleep a little while.  “No, Ma.  I’m not tired and I have options!”  My giggles would not suppress.  Oh, what are your options?  “Well, I can get down this way or I can get down that way!”  The ends of the daybed were open where the middle was blocked by his safety rail.  The option exercised was the one closest to the door where we escaped to play until time for the train ride.

Whether you are a toddler or a senior citizen, you DO have options!

Lately I have been plagued with hyper sensitivity.  Why does the world have to be so cruel?  Why do people I know have to be so mean, so rude?  D wisely advises to not let things bother me, but I do.  My brain is wired to rethink, rehash, relive – wondering, questioning, analyzing incidents. To. Death. 

So what are my options?

If I were Taylor Swift, I would vent by writing a song.  Mean: 

You, with your words like knives
And swords and weapons that you use against me
You have knocked me off my feet again
Got me feeling like I'm nothing
You, with your voice like nails on a chalkboard
Calling me out when I'm wounded
You picking on the weaker man

You can take me down with just one single blow
But you don't know, what you don't know...

You, with your switching sides
And your wildfire lies and your humiliation
You have pointed out my flaws again
As if I don't already see them
I walk with my head down
Trying to block you out 'cause I'll never impress you
I just wanna feel okay again

I bet you got pushed around
Somebody made you cold
But the cycle ends right now
'Cause you can't lead me down that road
And you don't know, what you don't know...

If I were Edvard Munch, I would create an expressive painting of The Scream.

Since I am me, I have to turn to the inspired words of books and speakers to guide me. The theme that has been coming to me from words of wisdom is JOY!  From my current read, the Lessons of Saint Francis, I find that a common occurrence in our modern era with people who lived in the 1200s is darkness and bad news.  Francis warned his students that dejection could “generate an abiding rust in the heart”.  Remember the tin man; I don’t want my heart to be ruined by rust!  Francis went on to caution the friars that Satan sought to exaggerate even the slightest wrongs into full- fledged crises.  “The devil exults when he can extinguish or even impede the devotion and joy brought about by pure prayer or other good works in the heart of God’s servant…it would be very easy for the devil to take the slightest thing and turn it into an ever heavier burden.” (when I first was writing this post and came to this quote about the devil, my computer mysteriously shut down and I lost everything I had written- damn the devil!- it completely creeped me out but I took a break and came back – there!) Just manually saved.  Precaution.

Francis was not denying the reality of bad news, he was instead encouraging his people to avoid dwelling on sadness and cynicism that could block out the light of God and the light of love.

 http://www.firstmethodistgrapevine.org/10664/blogentry/entry_id/430037/The-Birth-of-Joy

During my break from the devil, I listened to an advent sermon podcast by Cindy Ryan, speaking about the pink advent candle of Joy. I had heard it back in December but it seemed like good timing to hear it again.  She talked about Joy as being out of place in our world of craziness and pain.  Joy is a supernatural gift from God.  It can be found in sunny days in January, cloud formations, sunsets, butterflies, hugs, smiles, toasts, wildlife spottings, FB posts, innocent words of little children, books, songs, art – it’s all around.  Just look.

 

 

In the recent sports world wrapped up in football mania, one commentator spoke about his time under the coaching leadership of Bill Parcells.  Preparing his team for playoffs, film would be viewed of various players while mistakes were pointed out.  The coach would say, “Don’t be that guy!”  I have been too aware of those who criticize, exclude, shun, ignore, hate, lie – it’s not pretty.  So the option I choose is – don’t be that guy.

A quote from Mr. Rogers comes to mind, “When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, “Look for the helpers.  You will always find people who are helping.””

For me (and maybe for you), choices are in how to respond to people/events that bring you down.  I can carry hurt, I can avoid situations, I can grow thicker skin, I can retaliate – or I can look for the good in the midst of all the messiness.  When I look for the good, I see it is so many times stronger than the bad.  There is the joy!

Philippians 4:8  Finally brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things.

Romans 15:13 May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

 

 

 

 

Supernatural

Luke 1:37 For with God nothing shall be impossible.

This is the story of a $1000 donation to Weekend Food from Berkeys.

My heart is heavy with the needs of children – not constantly in my fore thoughts, but constantly in my subconsiousness.  Visions of my visits with hungry children in Africa remind me to support them with my prayers, my words and my finances.  Knowledge of hungry children in my own hometown should bring the same response.

 

Debbie Price and I connected at some time in the fall to discuss possible grant writing to seek funding for the growing numbers in the Weekend Food Program. 
http://www.firstmethodistgrapevine.org/Content.aspx?site_id=10664&content_id=254828
 I had successfully submitted many educational grants during my time as a public school teacher so I knew that experience could help me work on grants for this community need.  First research what grant opportunities are out there – many, many can be found but requirements for a non-profit Tax ID code would not match our administrative plans through church missions.  Most opportunities available count us out, except for those listed through Wal Mart.

Local communication came to mind, so I drafted a letter to share with businesses and community groups.  Many were sent out by email to car dealerships and insurance agencies.  Results were zero response. Maybe those requests just filtered to junk mail? Dear God, am I wrong to think that you want this?

What I really believe is this.  God is so personal.  He knows our thoughts – both cognitive and subconscious.  He knows our desires – and smiles on those aligned with his good purposes.  He wants his children to be fed – both physically and spiritually.  He is the supernatural, ultimate, intimate power – and delights when we recognize this at work in the world.  Some people call it amazing coincidence – I call it God’s hands.

On one random day during the holidays, a business advertisement randomly appeared on my Facebook news feed showing a local company called Berkeys.  At the time I did not need air conditioning or heating service but something else about their ad caught my attention. They needed to make a holiday contribution to a worthy favorite charitable program.  The notice asked for an essay of 100 words or less to explain the mission and needs of such a group who could use a donation.  My heart beat quicker as I recognized hearts that God had prepared for giving!  I shared their post to put it on my home page with plans to come back to it later and apply.  As you can tell from this story, my writing tends to be wordy!  My saved letter was edited down to meet their maximum word requirement and submitted through Facebook.  Christmas plans took over my daily life and I forgot about the Berkeys post …until I received a notice in the final days of advent that this business had selected Weekend Food for their planned donation.  God is the divine connector!  I am awed and amazed but I know it is not just a coincidence.

 

In the following days even more good news for Weekend Food, Walmart awarded a grant through Debbie’s application from last year, church members made donations and a former GCISD teacher led her family to gather food and money to support feeding these kids in Grapevine.  God is good, all the time!

 

John 15:5  I am the vine, ye are the branches:  He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same beareth much fruit:  for apart from me ye can do nothing.

Psalm 31:19   Oh how great is thy goodness, which thou hast laid up for them that fear thee; which thou hast wrought for them that trust in thee before the sons of men!

 

Christmas Letter

 

 

 

December 2014, Christmas Greetings!

If you are reading this, we are in some way connected.  Thank you for the part you have played in blessing our lives!  Thinking about the season of Advent and the symbols of the candles, these ideas & events sum up our year.

Hope – Terrible and silly stories fill up our TV news, computer home pages and hometown chatter yet in the midst of all the noise, there are pockets of hope.  That’s the fun in our enjoyed past times of fishing, hunting and golf, gardening and games (still love poker, learning Mah Jong), cooking and crafts. Hope in the anticipation of something good!

Peace – Where is your “happy place”?  Walking the gullies and animal trails of the old family home place surrounded by rough landscapes of mesquite trees, prickly pear, rocky sandstone and wide open sky 180 degrees; Wind, sun and water welcoming visitors on the lake; Cozied up in a lazy boy recliner, good book in the lap, comforting view out the back door of the changing seasons; Stirring up the embers of a campfire; Awareness of smallness surrounded by Rocky Mountains.  Peace is all around us, all the time.  We just need to notice.

Joy - The greatest joy we found in family, friends (people and pets) and acts of service. The grandchildren share lots of smiles, hugs and fun.  Keller is 2.5+, lives in Austin TX with his parents Jonathan and Erica; he loves cars, trucks, trains and outside! Sadie is the little mountain girl, 15 months, living in Redstone CO with her parents Travis and Chelsea.  She likes to dance and ski!  Another granddaughter will join the family in March (Keller becomes a big brother), more joy!

Love – So much to love about life!  We had a great celebration of Papaw’s (Benny Kohn, Susan’s father) 80^th birthday.  All the family met in Buena Vista CO for a long weekend in July where we shared a rented home for some good times together - Enjoyed golf, hikes, hot springs and soothing scenery of the creeks, rivers and mountains. Another milestone of love, we celebrated our 40^th Anniversary of marriage – a little party with friends, including some members of the original wedding party.

Christ – The foundation of life; the source of our blessings; the reason for celebrating.

Romans 15:13

May all the symbols of Advent put light in your life and peace in your heart,

Darrell and Susan Green

Vintage Vow

 

Private Commitment, Guess it's not private now!

Matthew 6:25-33 New International Version (NIV)
25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life[a]?

28 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29 Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? 31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.

Looking for confirmation for my inspiration, these are books, interviews, movies, blogs that captured my inquiring attention.

Oprah Winfrey's recent book, What I Know for Sure

Video: Sarah Lazarovic joins TODAY to talk about why she swore off clothes and shoes for 365 days, and the lessons she learned, which she details in her new book, “A Bunch of Pretty Things I Did Not Buy.” Today show, Oct. 29, 2014

Jen Hatmaker books, 7 and Interrupted

Linda Sue Parks book, A Long Walk to Water

Ron Howard produced movie, The Good Lie

Ashley Randall, ashleyrandallphotography.com, blog and photos

Have you made vows in your life? Did you keep them? To me, a vow is more sacred, more binding than a passing promise. 40 years ago vows were spoken at our wedding ceremony. Mine were taken from the Bible verses where Ruth commits to her mother-in-law, Naomi, to go with her wherever, adopting her people and her God to be her own. These words have proven to be personally important in resolving conflicts in my marriage relationship brought on by moves and associations. Confession to thoughts of "why the heck am I here?"

December 13, 1985 a second personal vow was made as I laid in the snow begging God to let my lost child to be found. I promised God to do anything he asked of me. The volunteer firefighters found my child emerging from frozen woods a few miles down the road and returned him to the safety of home. Do I keep to this? Sometimes yes and sometimes no, with the excuse of "not knowing for sure" what choice to make, what path to take. My excuse is pretty much BS because God gets his work done regardless of whether I choose to jump in and participate. Father, I crave your blessing!

Returning home from from Africa in the summer of 2013, my heart was heavy with awareness and conviction, my body was exhausted from dust, stale air and confinement of travel. I made a vow to stop shopping for myself. Not to stop food or toiletries or regular necessities. But no more slave to fashion, no more stuff! What American woman does not enjoy shopping, designing herself, designing her home? In my head was dread and anticipation of unhappiness. Knowing I had a closet bulging with enough clothing to last me the rest of my life did not comfort the looming loss of "newness". Over a year has passed and I have not found this new mindset to be difficult, really. Slowly purging the hangars and drawers, throwing away, giving away, making new dust rags has been an act of freedom - ongoing, still not finished. Here's the list of clothing bought for my self in this time: Walmart package of socks - ran out while traveling before access to laundry (I guess I could have hand washed?), 2 t shirts that were purchased to support charities - high school PALS for Water is Basic, Pink for Kris for a friend fighting breast cancer, bathing suit bottom - because mine from last year was lost? Found it at the end of summer boat season when I pulled out a suitcase and unzipped a pocket that had not seen the world in a year. That's it! Now using a Dillard's gift card doesn't count, right? Maybe that sounds like a confession to cheating but to me, improvement!

Hosting two African guests at our church in the Spring, I was blessed to serve them several meals, guide them on school/community visits, provide social time at my house for a tea. Their words soaked into my soul as they spoke at our women's Thursday Bible study, prayed a blessing on our home and gave sermons in the Sunday worship services. Observations on the excesses of American culture that they passed on: 1. We have too much stuff! Our homes, garages, storage sheds and attics are overflowing and some of us even rent extra storage space at places away from our houses. Our refrigerators and pantries are super stocked so that we need to throw away what went unused. 2. We spend a lot of money on our dogs. Paying top dollar for their grooming and health care was shocking to a culture that considers household dogs only in the role of protection. We carelessly waste. I have become aware. I am trying to change. Something happens almost everyday to return my thoughts to Kenya. A seed of change was planted there. That seed is growing.

Checking out Oprah's book, I was hoping to find something concrete to support my vision of a simplified life. She had some sweet ideas about taking care of your self and keeping lofty perspectives but what I know for sure from reading her essays is this: Oprah is ri-i-i-ich! (Said in the disrespectful voice of the comedian Ron White.) Personal hardships brought her to the wisdom she shares today, but it all filters through the lifestyle of the rich and famous, not too much universal truth for all to ponder. Thanks Oprah but it seems I was looking in the wrong book for deep messages.

The Today show trailer kept me tuned in for an extra five minutes yesterday touting a woman who gave up shopping for a year. I thought, oh yeah, we will have something in common. Lol, so wrong! To curb her weakness for internet shopping, she started painting things she coveted instead of buying them. Not me.

The Jen Hatmaker books have connected me to a somewhat kindred spirit. We both attended Oklahoma Baptist University - her being maybe twenty years after me. She is pursuing change through spiritual terms, a shared philosophy. I have been rereading, note taking and using her work in quotes. One concept is that work done in service should be "relationally focused". That is where I feel at home. In peace. Content. Well with my soul.

The plight of problems facing children in Sudan is the focus of Linda Sue Parks' book and Ron Howard's film. Both inspire faith in God and humanity. Both challenge to awareness and service. Please read, please watch!

Ashley Randall is a darlin' Texas girl transplanted to California with her husband, both seeking to fulfill their creative dreams. She is a former student, now all grown up! She used to write a fashion blog with a focus on vintage clothing. That has run it's course and she now is blogging about photography, children and dogs. Memories of her creative clothing concoctions remind that I still don't need new clothes. My old stuff (some vintage) can be arranged in varying combinations and still look cool. Well, cool enough to satisfy me.

So I DO still enjoy shopping - for gifts! And it's becoming that season of year.

Christmas Any Time of Year

Magnet Quotes

"i am still learning." - Michelangelo
"It's not the years in your life that count, it's the life in your years." - Abraham Lincoln

Trying to simplify surroundings and live uncluttered with less stuff, we have slowly been cleaning out, throwing away, donating, discovering forgotten items and reorganizing the remains. The refrigerator still displays mementos from trips and sporting events, grandchildren pictures that bring a smile every day, held in places by many mismatched magnets. Two magnet quotes listed above came home with me from the classroom and still serve to remind me of important quests. What am I learning, still? What kind of life is filling my years?

A cousin's daughter entertains and encourages with her Facebook posts. One of her encouragements was to commit random acts of kindness at Christmastime and send her stories to go in Madison's memory stocking to be read and shared. Some years ago she gave birth to a baby girl named Madison, a baby who did not survive. Out of this sad event, she has been motivated to follow a life of service in a career as a social worker. She recently graduated from college and was accepted to graduate school to keep moving toward this professional path. Romans 8:28 And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. That verse does not diminish the pain of tragic events. We can all acknowledge that bad stuff happens in this world. But, in time, we can see how God works in connected events to bring us out of problems to a place of goodness.

Christmas deadline was not met, but here is my story for Madison's stocking.

There is an older lady I met at church. One of my first duties as a Stephens Minister was to wait up front at the altar at the end of a Sunday service for those coming forward with questions and prayer requests. This lady came to me one Sunday and we prayed for her friend's son who was being deployed to Afghanistan. Her look was a little disheveled and unkempt but she seemed to have a kind heart. At many events that required volunteers, I saw her there: packing lunches to feed kids during the summer, packing boxes of treats for soldiers and college kids, teaching crafts in Vacation Bible School, prayer services, Bible Studies. During these encounters I found out that she was a former teacher of Carrollton-Farmers Branch ISD where I grew up going to school. I learned that she lives alone in a small apartment near the church and walks everywhere instead of driving. I learned that she works the night shift stocking shelves at Walmart. I wondered what happened in her life to bring her to her current state of looking like a homeless person? How were our lives so different?

Vision of her as a changed person kept creeping into my mind. For Madison's memory stocking, I wanted to take her to a beauty shop and get her hair styled. On the other hand, I didn't want to offend her by suggesting that she might need to improve her appearance. Nearing Christmas I had prayed that if God really wanted me to do the make over offer that I would cross paths with her at church that day. Not seeing her before, during or after the main service where she usually attends, I thought, "OK, God, cross that off the list." Just as I was about to walk out the door to the parking lot a door to a storage room opened and there she was standing right in front of me. "OK, God, we're back on this!" I stammered my offer and her eyes were shining as she grasped my hands and said yes, she would love to go get a new hairdo. She doesn't have a phone but she gave me her address and we agreed to meet the next Tuesday for an outing to a nearby salon.

No answer to my many knocks on her door at our planned time. As I was writing a note to leave on her door, a neighbor came out to tell me he had not seen her in a few days and he seemed to know her regular schedule. This news worried me but the neighbor turned out to be the father of a good friend so I asked him to call his son and let him know if she showed up safely. We got a call that night to tell that her daughter who lives in a different town had come unexpectedly to take her for a visit. The hair stylist who had given me the appointment is also a friend. She understood the situation and agreed to be on call the same time for the next few weeks whenever I could meet her and bring her in to the shop. It takes a village!

It was January before we made our Christmas outing to the beauty salon. My friend, the stylist, took such tender care in shampooing and talking to her about her preferred style. She made her thin silvery strands look soft and pretty; she dipped the weathered hands in the paraffin bath and gently folded them in the plastic cover, pealing them back to reveal skin that was thin and soft. We learned that it had been necessary for her to leave the teaching profession earlier than anticipated as she had suffered a brain aneurysm in her early 40's. We learned she had grown up in the Valley and had moved to Fort Worth after high school to attend Texas Wesleyan College. We learned her husband lives in a care facility in a different town. We learned that her daughter also had a rare brain trauma as a girl and participated in studies by top doctors in Houston. We listened to many stories while the scissors and blow dryers provided background noise. The soundtrack to a life.

I still see this lady at various church gatherings. I have stopped by her apartment to visit and driven her home in bad weather. I have taken her food in covered containers, extras from our home plenty and leftovers from church event meals. Her hair has gone back to its previous limp style. She must share my same challenge of being unable to recreate the salon look with my own brush at home. When she opens the door of her apartment, used plastic bottles and shreds of old newspapers drift out the door, but a smile that reveals a sweet spirit spreads across an aging face and there is light.

God sent me to get a woman a haircut. He intended for me to be her friend.

Lesson learned. Life in the years.

Psalm 117:2 For his lovingkindness is great toward us, And the truth of The Lord is everlasting. Praise be to God.

Kenya Journal, Last Days, Animals

Appreciation is due to the many friends and well wishers who told me to have fun on this trip. I love you and I'm grateful for your kind thoughts, but fun was not my purpose. As I mentioned in my first journal entry, I felt that I was going on a spiritual journey. My prayer was for Him to show me what he wanted me to see and teach me what he wanted me to learn. Well, I would say that surely happened beyond my expectations!

The Bible school lessons are done, the school and church visits have concluded, food and many other items have been left behind in donations. There is still much needed in the world and it is up to every one of us to follow whatever we are called to do to make it better.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  Spending a full day from morning til mid afternoon at Sweetwaters Game Park was great fun! It's a 90,000 acre reserve for some of the remaining wild animals of Africa to live in their natural habitat. The top of the vans we had travelled in to remote areas all week now popped their tops up for us to stand for great close up views! We saw all kinds of gazelles, antelope, élan, water buffalo, elephants, cheetahs, lions, dik dik, wart hogs, chimpanzees, a rhino and lots of zebras! Oh my! One of the lions was a young male just starting to grow his beard and mane; he came right up to the back of our van and boldly, proudly walked past. The other two lions were female and we saw them slowly approach a herd of zebras, antelope and gazelles. The herd immediately went on high alert and established a large antelope guard at one side and a zebra on the other end of their grazing area, amazing to watch! After scouting all the wild life, we had the best meal of the whole trip, an African/Western buffet with French desserts served in their tented restaurant and they had western bathrooms! What a treat!

Driving back to Nairobi in intermittent showers, we came upon a long line of traffic stopped on a two lane road. Someone up ahead had some sort of accident and no one was moving. Sammy , our faithful driver, knew the urgency of the time schedule for our evening meal and then airport departure. He was not about to fail on his duties so he decided to detour on a side road to move ahead of the wreck. Ahead of us on this same dirt/ mud road detour was a bread delivery truck. The truck did not make it up a very steep hill & was backing up when Sammy chose to make a pass around it. We were just past the truck when a back wheel slid off the road and into the ditch, smoking the brakes as he tried to drive out of the hole. Despite his best efforts, we became embedded deeper in mud. A lot of people along this route showed up to offer advice and assistance and Sammy told all the men to get out and help and the 3 women to stay in the van. They brought on rocks and branches to pack the mud under the wheel and physically rocked and pushed the vehicle back into position. You've heard, it takes a village! Since Sammy had jumped back in to drive while the man were pushing he had to keep gunning past the crest of the hill to be sure not to slip backwards; our men had a ways to walk to catch up to us. Always an adventure here! We were on time for our dinner reservation and our flight thanks to Sammy, the villagers and God's providence.

We're now on the last leg of our journey home, (day 12) flying on British Air from London to Dfw. The flight monitor on the seat shows us to be just entering the skies over Newfoundland, Canada. Almost home...

People may assume that those in extreme poverty have nothing to give. Everything I saw in this journey testifies against that notion. We gave time, financial support, food, supplies and listening ears. They gave love, gratitude and blessing upon blessing til it overflowed. What do you think was the best part?

Matthew 5:3-12 The Beatitudes

Blessed are the poor in spirit; for theirs is the kingdom of heaven...